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Salamishah Tillet has an interesting piece up on The Nation, and adds nicely to my own thoughts about the tradition and institution of marriage.
Somehow contriving the perfect, dream wedding since watching Cinderella is every girl’s time-consuming hobby. I don’t remember ever spending an exorbitant amount of time playing pretend wedding with Barbie dolls, but I know I’ve thought about what my wedding might be. That was in high school.
Fast forward a couple years and not so much. It’s not a priority, and it’s a thought that doesn’t get mental play time, unless someone brings it up. My parents don’t even badger us about it, which is awesome.
But like Tillet, my partner (“boyfriend” loses its meaning after a certain number of years, it has a very juvenile, short time frame meaning to it) and I have been bombarded with questions about getting married. We’ve been together for eight years, which may not be as long as Tillet’s 14-year-non-married relationship, but long enough to raise some eyebrows at us.
I consider myself to be the type of person who doesn’t subscribe to socially constructed expectations of gendered behaviors, and this is not some recent development after getting some liberal college education.
I have dabbled with makeup here and there but overall, I don’t use the stuff. I don’t have a compulsion to buy things because some magazine said it was the ‘now’ trend. I don’t read women’s magazines because they’re full of shit. Sometimes I have fat days, but I won’t starve myself for fear of appearing fat because that’s just stupid. And I don’t clean house because I’m the only girl living with two guys and it’s expected of me, or cook for my partner because I’m a girl.
After Vice President Joe Biden announced his support for same-sex marriage, it was only a matter time before the President made a similar announcement. But I admit, I was nervous. What if Obama didn’t make a statement—supportive or otherwise?
It was a delight to hear Obama say that same-sex couples should be able to marry, citing his own personal observations of his daughters’ friends’ parents, and of the relationships of the people who work for him. It’s a big step from 2008 when he said he supported civil unions but not same-sex marriage, and despite polls showing increased support for the legalization of same-sex marriage, his announcement was a well-deserved risk to his re-election campaign.
About Gina
I recently graduated from the Uni. of Maryland with a B.A. in journalism.
I'm a web production intern with Education Week, in Bethesda, Md.
When I'm not working, I'm writing, photographing, reading or cooking.
All my opinions are my own, and do not reflect EdWeek's, or anyone else's views or endorsements.
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